Medical needs and so much more

Medical? , Douglas G

How do you know when to ask for help? After you are sitting in the dark with your 13yr old son? After you have sold all your belongings to try to pay some of your bills? After you find out you have to have an emergency hysterectomy because your kidneys are going to start shutting down? Ok well now that all of the above has bee done in our house I guess now it's time to ask for money. I have family. I have a good family but none that is able to support us during the time it will take to have the surgery and the recovery time. Where do you go for help? What do you do? My son said he is happy to get a job which broke my heart. He's only 13! I started a gofundme site because someone told it may help. 5.00 is more than we have now. I had a friend in Florida FedEx us some food. Wow how do you even say thank you for that??!! People around here can't or won't help. I live in a very small town and I think it's because people begged for help who didn't really need it. That's insane. So here we are...what to do now? I prayed for God to take my pride away and he has which is what brings me here. Am I venting? Probably. It's tough for me because to think that my son has to go through this now just hurts my heart. His father is on his way to prison for attempted murder. He used to beat my son and now we're in a great place. After my son overcoming all that he still has a heart of gold. He has such a sweet spirit. He has a forgiving heart which is why he said he don't mind whatever happens here. But I want better for him. At least to have the lights on. That too much to ask? I don't think so. He's been kind, he's been obedient. He's forgiving. He's all the things the Lord has asked him to be so then is it me that has not been the same? Is that why he is to suffer now? Wow that hurts my heart even more. I don't question God and don't misunderstand, I'm not questioning him now....I just feel as though I have and continue to let my son down in more ways then I know how to correct.