Broke beyond hope

Wasted it, Germany

I guess I just wasted my life and a promising career. After my family broke apart, I recovered over the years, staying with my father and, after some time, with a kind foster family. Life turned around and it became great again. I had a family, a good perspective and very nice education. Then I fell apart. It all started with me not getting a grip on my personal finance, so I found myself stranded in Atlanta, GA. I made my way back to Germany and got a job in Asia with a comfortable salary. That salary gave me the illusion that I could afford almost anything and I not only bought a lot of stuff that I realized I never needed, but it also made me finance a friend who turned out to be nothing but a cheat. She has left me and took a great deal of money with her, leaving no evidence but my memories of this cheating. But I recovered. At least I thought I did. I was naive and bought a car, rented an apartment and led a quiet life. Friends were my anchor, just like my father was. He passed away in December and I wasted everything since then. I started drinking, which I quit now, but some people out there might imagine the vicious circle it drags you into. Now I sit here with debts that are through the roof and when I tried to buy some groceries today, my card was rejected. I don't know what to do. I would love so much to get my life back on track. I know I can do it, but I need a little push. Unfortunately, the one single person who keeps my in line and who is the kindest person I have ever met, cannot support me and she shouldn't, as she needs to focus on her ambitions and her dreams first. I don't want to slow her down, so I don't even ask her - also, because I know she simply couldn't. So, this is my life, spread out in front of you. Now it's up to you. My arms are outstretched and I can only wait for a warm breeze to lift me up instead of the cold, biting wind in my face beating me down.